I spend a lot of time searching through my past

Allowing myself to be tortured and harassed

I make myself look at the chaos all around

I scrutinize the mistakes that are littered on the ground

I make myself relive each and every regret

I do this to myself so I won’t forget

I can’t pretend that I never caused pain

Some of the choices I’ve made are hard to explain

I am aware of the bad inside of me

I keep it contained because that is not who I want to be

I can’t pretend that the past is not there

I have to accept that somethings are beyond repair

I will continue to strive to be a better me

Maybe by accepting this truth I will finally be free


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