The Silence Grows

The Silence grows between you and I
Forming a wedge that I can not pry
Pushing us both further away
Causing all the hateful words we say
It eats at us one piece at a time
Flipping our worlds on a dime
This silence that grows stronger every day
Laughing at us because we allow it to stay
I look at you, sitting right there
So close, I could touch you, but I do not dare
The distance I feel holds me back
Makes me question what it is we lack
Uncertainty that will continually grow
Filling our heads nice and slow
It inches us further day after day
Pushing us apart as we find no words to say
I don’t know why we are allowing it to win
Letting it destroy us is a real sin
All we have to do is let the words out
Open up with each other so there is no doubt
It’s not too much for me to ask
It’s what we need to make this last

Oilfield Wife

I watch my husband turn and leave
My heart breaks and begins to bleed
He’s off to work to start his hitch
It’s time for me to make the switch
I chose to be an Oilfield wife
This is my path, this is my life
I feel the sadness of my kids
I see the tear on their eyelids
It’s my job to make it okay
It’s what I do while he is away
When he comes home again
We pick back up and life begins
It’s our routine, our way of life
It’s what you do as an Oilfield wife

Sometimes…..

Sometimes you can’t fix

The things that are broken

Sometimes you have no words

That are worth being spoken

Sometimes you have to learn

That letting go is not failing

Sometimes you have to accept

Walking away is not bailing

There will be times in your life

When there will be nothing you can do

No way that you can change

Nothing you can undo

So pick yourself up

And just move on

Because a new opportunity

Will rise with the dawn

Smile On My Face

I’ve loved and I’ve lost

I’ve learned to survive at all cost

I’ve seen pain and I’ve seen joy

My heart has been used as a toy

I’ve made countless mistakes

I’ve also caused a few heartaches

I’ve been knocked down to the ground

But I’ve always found a way to rebound

I’ve lived my life, the good and the bad

I’ve worked really hard to disguise the sad

I know what it’s like to be let down

I know what it’s like to have your heart shut down

I’ve seen some good and I’ve seen some evil

I’ve seen pain so intense it can cripple

Yet each day I wake up with a smile on my face

Happy to be alive in this crazy place

Ode to My Daughter

Image

You’re my little girl

With your sweet smile

Your infectious laugh

And crazy sense of style

You brighten my day

By just being you

You light up my life

With the nice things you do

I am so proud

Of who you’ve become

You’re a remarkable person

Full of love, life and then some

I love to watch

You grow everyday

I love to hear

The sweet words you say

No matter how old you get

You will always be my baby

I will always love you

You mean the world to me

My Flaw

Sometimes I’m too focused on what I lack

And I spend too much time looking back

Sometimes I ignore what’s right in front of me

Too busy wanting a life that is never going to be

I get caught up in little things that don’t even matter

Always asking questions that I cannot answer

I push people away, build walls around my heart

I curse things to fail right from the start

I say I am protecting my heart, yet I never let it feel

I keep it locked away, safe from the kill

I want to just let go and finally be free

But there is always something that stops me

Something that tells me protection is the best

Why take a chance and hurt like the rest

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Wake Me Before You Go

Wake me before you go

Give me a kiss nice and slow

Take my love out the door

Keep me in your heart for sure

Tell me how much you love me

Show me so that I can see

That even though you’re gone away

It won’t be long before you return my way

Wake me before you go

With tender kisses nice and slow

Hold me tight one last time

Feel my love in this rhyme

Know that my love is forever

Nothing in this world could ever sever

So I will wait until you return

Keeping you in my heart where my love burns

copyright@jadabroussard2015

Fear Ride

I have this fear building inside

It won’t take long before I can’t hide

I try to tell myself it’s no big deal

But what I feel is for real

An intensity that continually grows

A chilling wind that constantly blows

Fear so strong it can become crippling

Sending shock waves through you like water rippling

I want to believe it’s only in my mind

But the truth always has a way to find

I try not to succumb to the terror inside

But there are no exits on this ride

copyright@jadabroussard2015

The War

I’ve been loved and I’ve been lonely

I have support sometimes, but mostly it’s just me only

I’ve learned how to stand on my own two feet

I’ve learned how to survive no matter how bad I am beat

I know how to pick up the pieces that break

I’ve found courage for my own sake

I know how to fight and be strong

Even when I do not belong

I know how to move forward

How to keep my wits when things are awkward

I have become a very skilled fighter

Working each day to find my closure

Life has a way of defining who you are

As it gives you the tools to survive the war

copyright@jadabroussard2015

Reflect

I spend a lot of time searching through my past

Allowing myself to be tortured and harassed

I make myself look at the chaos all around

I scrutinize the mistakes that are littered on the ground

I make myself relive each and every regret

I do this to myself so I won’t forget

I can’t pretend that I never caused pain

Some of the choices I’ve made are hard to explain

I am aware of the bad inside of me

I keep it contained because that is not who I want to be

I can’t pretend that the past is not there

I have to accept that somethings are beyond repair

I will continue to strive to be a better me

Maybe by accepting this truth I will finally be free

No Me Without You

The happiest part of me is you

My joy comes from the things you do

I feel whole with you by my side

I no longer feel the need to hide

You showed me a love I’d never known

The kind of love that can be grown

You fought for me even when I gave up

You held me tight when my life blew up

I never knew what I needed until I met you

I didn’t understand it because it was so new

I tried to keep my heart intact

But loving you was not a choice but a fact

Every time I try to walk away

Something inside me compels me to stay

I know the truth of what losing you would do

There would be no me without you

Loneliness

How can you feel so alone

Even when you are surrounded by your own

How can you be so lost

When all paths crisscross

Always looking for something to find

Feeling unsettled in your mind

Reaching out for someone to hold

Finding there is nothing but cold

Loneliness eats at you deep inside

Pulls you under like the tide

Tries to convince you that no one is there

Tries to show you that no one cares

Loneliness can seep into your soul

Eat you up, make you lose control

You have to fight it, don’t let it win

It will take your life if you let it in

Memory

I rummage through my brain

Looking for a memory

Any scrap of knowledge

To prove what you were to me

I search through time

Recalling the past

Trying to find the place

That I saw you last

Memories are flying

From left to right

I see so many

But you are no where in sight

I push myself harder

Going further in my mind

Then I suddenly stop

For you I did find

I see your face

That beautiful smile

I bask in your glory

For just a little while

A tear falls as you

Begin to slowly disappear

And then you are gone

Just like always my dear

I see

I see the you that you try to hide

The one that you keep barricaded inside

I see the truth of who you are

I know what you’re hiding, I see the scar

I see the pain that lives inside your eyes

I watch your hope as it slowly dies

I can hear the words that you cannot find

I see the wall you try to hide behind

I see what is real, not your make believe

I see the regret and the way you grieve

I see it all, don’t you see

You don’t have to lie to me